Dating apps: A Quest for Love

Rezkyro Poltak Samuel Pasaribu
5 min readJun 30, 2022

Sounds cool huh? so this is a review of popular 3 dating apps I’m going to review as an Indonesian based in Jakarta plus I’m going to tell about my experience when I’m using them.

There are 3 popular dating apps I’m currently using: Tinder, Bumble, and Coffee Meet Bagels, and this is a review based on thousands of swipes I've done for an entire year.

let's get started then

  1. Tinder
Photo by Good Faces Agency on Unsplash

The uber-popular dating apps are perhaps the most recognizable ones. majority of people would install this first and then move to other apps.

the app is geosocial networking which means you are going to meet the profile based on your radius range. Do you want to meet a match that is 50 km away? then go ahead and set the radius distance.

most of the profiles are focusing on their photos, people rarely put information around, and if I do want to read about the information, I have to tap on the “I” icon to scroll down for the full profile.

but in Tinder? who the hell reads profile? it's all about the looks. Do you want people to see you as a really wealthy daddy? well have a picture with sports car or go to a really expensive holiday destination (not Bali ofc, u basic or something?). Your photo going to tell you who you are, but the thing is people could make fake photos or play pretend right?

Because it is super popular, it also attracts many kinds of people, and not in a good way, well you do have a plethora of choices but that choices would include people who are offering, sex services, MLM, promoting their business, promoting IG page, and the worst are these financial planner salespeople.

I don’t find much success on tinder, most of the women don’t really know how to converse (they talked like robots from the 80 who answer with 1 word or less)or don’t even know what their goal is when using the app. Because you don’t really describe yourself in a profile it was really hard to have a good conversation.

if I have to rate it, I would give it 5/10, it's definitely your first step into the dating app experience. but again there are a lot of weird people who are offering you something that the app is not intended for.

2. Bumble

Photo by Good Faces Agency on Unsplash

The second dating app I used, the feature is almost similar to tinder but the app demands that the lady have to start the conversation in order for the match room to continue, which means she has to double down on her likes and the Important part is that you can have a lot of description to your profile.

But on the downside, a man cannot initiate the conversation, even though she likes you, if she didn’t text within 24 hours then she’s a goner. But sometimes it's better that way, why bother with women who doesn't have interest in you?

They have question prompts which you can answer in a jokey-ish kinda way or on a serious note. such as :

My personal hell is….

A fun fact I’m obsessed with…..

My most useless skill is….

Questions like that could help you tell who you are in a bio, if you do have a hard time writing the “about me” section well bumble would help you with this fun or serious question to help you bring more personality to your profile.

I have a great experience with Bumble because it is “semi-popular” which means the app is pretty well-curated. There are people with genuine goals in their relationship, people who are well educated, and great conversationalists. By far I met around 18 people with Bumble.

I would give 9/10 for the app, I read most of the profiles if they do write something in their bio, you could tell their personality with it.

3. Coffee Meets Bagels

Coffe Meets Bagel Logo

Perhaps the tippy top or the upper echelon of the 3 dating apps for me, CMB has different features between the Tinder and Bumble. you have limited (around 25–32 profiles a day) and curated profiles, which would be updated at noon every day. This feature is good if you are a professional and you don’t have a lot of time on your hands.

The chatroom only lasts for a week, and you have to determine whether to move to another chatting application or just close the chat all the way.

Most of the profiles I met came from the upper economical class who studied abroad or at least they have a holiday in Europe pictures which means they’re quite wealthy.

But most of the profiles are freakin empty, people rarely write something or do even describe themselves on their bio. most profiles only have 8–12 words even though they have built-in questions from the apps, no one really describes themselves.

The problem is this app does have expensive paywalls, they use the “beans” system which means you have to buy points to use certain features, 100 beans cost around Rp.26.000 (around 2 USD, assumption of 1 USD=Rp 14.500 ), and even the Premium plans cost Rp. 359.000 (around 24 USD).

I have moderate success with this app, I manage to go on 4 dates with this, but the curated profile doesn’t really work well for me, and CMB has one of the worst connection problems with their chatrooms. you need a really strong internet connection when you talk with someone, the text sometimes won’t send, sending pictures could take up to 30 seconds–1 minute, the notification of the chat wouldn't show up on your phone and there are no playful GIFs to use.

I would rate it 7/10. even though the people have amazing profile pictures, education, and jobs, they don't really write about themselves and the app has connection issues.

Conclusion

Out of the 3 applications I use, Bumble does encourage people to write and complete their profiles. With a complete profile and a lot of playful descriptions, you could have a lot of conversations with your matches. for me it's better to know someone first, based on their profile since I don't want to waste time chatting with a lot of people.

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Rezkyro Poltak Samuel Pasaribu

An Indonesian with massive interest in politics, Law, and pop culture.